Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Some Context (IB4 Intro Redux)

Relationships can be difficult. And complicated.
As you may recall, Infinite Book 3: My Truest Fiction ended with my rapid engagement to a woman with secrets named Isabella. Born a witch and intrinsically selfish, she told lies really well. She also valued the pleasures of truth, which pleasures she clutched tightly to her chest. On account of my honesty, she clutched me in just the same way.
“We’re split-parts,” she said.
Our minds matched. Our hearts matched. Our bodies did, too. We dreamed big and worked small, which is how we managed to extract so much from so little.
Isabella had a tattoo. It meant Mercury and Taurus to her. It meant Aries and Ua En Sen to me. We shared these things, and in so doing offered one another both grounding and direction. Having payed attention to our surroundings our entire lives, we knew many things.
The most important of these was this. If our paths could align, healing would happen. 
But first, on that fateful day in 2009, we needed to meet and fall in love…

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Infinite Book Series Cover Redux

Okay. It's been so long since I published Infinite Books 1-3, and the notion of jumping to Infinite Book 5 (sans 4 & 6) has kinda lost its luster, that I've decided to number each volume of the Infinite Book Series in a straight-forward, sequential manner. So, slated are Infinite Books 1-8. Plus, due to the troubles I'm having with regarding the Kindle versions of Infinite Books 1-3, I've also decided to stick with paperbound books exclusively. I'll probably still publish through CreateSpace, but even that's not yet decided.

In honor of this re-envisioning, I've whipped together (through Pixelmator, a terrific little program for the Mac platform) eight covers. They may not be stellar, but I think I like them enough they've a good shot at being part of the final books put up for sale through online - and even offline - distribution.

So, without further adieu, here they are:

Saturday, February 4, 2017

A Look Forward: IB5

Preface: Some Context

This is the first of three supplemental volumes intended to explore at much greater depth certain aspects of the two preceding volumes of my memoir cycle.
Infinite Book 3: My Truest Fiction was a literary transfenestration through the looking glass of so-called psychosis.
Infinite Book 4: Recovered Dreams was a massive overview of my life experience, from birth to the year I turned 47 (2017).
This volume (IB5) focuses on sex.
The next (IB6) will focus on drugs (and pharmaceuticals).
The final volume will underpin everything I’ve so far explored with an intricate conceptualization of consciousness and its multivalent relationship to reality.

Read on, if you dare… 

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

IB4 Excerpt

A lot happened there, in that house. I mean, a lot was revealed. About Isabella and her mental condition. About Isabella and her love of alcohol. Forgive me for not building this up with careful foreshadowing and well-timed reveals. It would have been a more interesting read, I suppose. But it’s not.
One thing I need to relate, though, is the first room on Isabella’s cleaning list was the bathroom. She gathered cleaning supplies and asked me to handle the toilet. Almost breaking into tears, she excused herself to her (our) bedroom. I called through the door just to check on her. She said she was okay, so I thought it best not to press on the subject. After making the toilet presentable, I started in on the tub. Isabella came back. At first, she boxed and organized all the soaps and other bathroom essentials. Then she really got to work on the sink. She didn’t say much, but when she had to ask me to make room because I was in her way, I noticed a southern drawl in her voice.
Concerned, I asked, “Are you alright?”
“Why, of course darlin’. You must be David. My name’s Alice.”
“I’ve heard nothin’ but good things ‘bout you, David. Happy to meet your acquaintance. I’m sorry. It must be terribly disorientin’ for you to hear me speakin’ outta Bella’s mouth. How do I look?”
That’s how I met Alice. Turned out, when Alice looked at herself in the bathroom mirror, she saw a pretty 5’7” redhead. Isabella was 5’10” and a brunette. A caretaker personality, Alice helped fill me in on some of Isabella’s history. She didn’t stay long after finishing the sink, but said she’d return. Then she did a kind of double-take with her eyes and pressed a hand to the bathroom wall.
Suddenly, Isabella was back. Clearly shaken, she darted into the bedroom once more.
I followed cautiously and spoke with her at length about what happened. I carefully explained what I’d just witnessed. Giving her plenty of time and space to sort through her divergent realities, I mapped out my experience of things as best I could.
There was more than just one other consciousness in Isabella’s head. Later, we’d learn Isabella suffered from DID - Dissociative Identity Disorder (what used to be called Multiple Personality Disorder). This meant certain alternate personalities (“alters” for short) would step in at any given moment to protect her core personality from potentially traumatic events and/or thoughts. Usually. Unfortunately, not all her alters were interested in Isabella’s welfare. Also, whenever her awareness switched over, Isabella wound up with holes in her memory. She called these perceptual blackouts “lost time”. These holes in her memory lasted anywhere from fifteen minutes to several hours, although sometimes a particular hole might last up to a few days or more.
Bella was Isabella’s core. The “innocent” one, so to speak. The one who thought the world might actually be an okay enough place despite itself. Isabella, on the outside, was feisty. Bella, on the inside, had too much to lose. Together, they were closely intertwined. They blurred into each other and shared most memories equally. While Isabella and Bella were facets of one central core, the other personalities I interacted with were manifold not only in name, but in essence as well. Here’s a short list, loosely ordered chronologically according to when I learned their names:

1. Alice (alter)
2. Isabel (spirit ancestor)
3. Vivienne (past incarnation)
4. Courtney (lost soul)
5. Heather (alter)
6. Chelsea (alter)
7. Brad (lost soul)
8. Catherine (alter)

Alice I’ve already described. Isabel was a German witch from Isabella’s matriarchal family line, going back seven generations. Vivienne was a flapper from San Francisco (roaring ‘20s and all that). Courtney was a runaway teenager. Heather was a man-hating drinker who liked to scrap. Chelsea was a timid little girl fearful of family abuse. Brad was a young black man who promised to help me keep Chelsea safe. And Catherine was a vindictive Trojan Horse of a personality. More on her later. Much later.
All of this was as exciting as it was frightening. But, if you understand anything I wrote in IB3: My Truest Fiction, then you should have a semi-decent notion regarding my level of preparedness when it comes to navigating the weird and unknown. In fact, I kinda almost get off on it. Kinda. Almost.